How to Make Your Girlfriend Happy Again After a Argument

If you want to understand why your ex is texting you lot after a breakup then there are nine things that yous need to have into account.

Past looking at these nine "motivations" you will get a clearer picture on why your ex insists on texting yous.

Now, if y'all know annihilation about me and so yous'd know that I like to be very thorough in my articles. Heck, just accept a await at my best selling book for bear witness of that (hint: It'due south perhaps a little as well thorough.)

Ultimately by the end of this article my intention is that you'll have a clear understanding of exactly why your ex is texting you.

ix Reasons Why Your Ex Is Texting Yous

There are 2 main things y'all are going to want to take into account when trying to understand why your ex boyfriend is texting you and how to respond.

  1. Offset, consider if yous are still in the centre of a no contact period.  Take into account how long he has been sending you these unsolicited texts.
  2. Secondly, what indicators are you lot seeing that suggest your ex is behaving differently from how he ordinarily responds to yous?

Knowing these things will give you a properties of his mindset and motivations and will assistance you translate his reasoning for texting yous.

(Side Note: I go through this process a lot more than in-depth in my book Ex Boyfriend Recovery PRO. So, if you are looking for a more in-depth explanation I'd encourage you to cheque that out.)

Think, when you are in the no contact period, your ex is going to be feeling just as vulnerable as you are.  Then you might not hear from him for awhile.  So don't freak out if y'all don't hear from him it's actually quite common.

At present, one of the biggest benefits to owning a large website similar this is I get access to a lot of data and it's through that data that I am able to pinpoint the all-time methods to get an ex back. I'g too able to get insight into why people do the things that they do.

When information technology comes to the reasons for why an ex will text you after a breakup I have found that in that location are typically 9 things motivations that are consequent.

  1. Your ex is feeling guilt about what went down
  2. Loneliness may be pulling your ex down so they look to you to pull them up
  3. Your ex is bored
  4. Your ex may exist fighting off their anger and resentment
  5. They want sex
  6. They miss you equally a friend
  7. They want to meet if you accept given upwards and moved on
  8. It might exist most the relationship
  9. They might actually want you back

Lets dissect these motivations ane past one.

Reason #1: Your Ex Fellow Is Feeling Guilt About What Went Downward

I'thousand going to first past talking about guilt

Your ex might text you if he is feeling guilty almost the breakdown. This kind of endeavour to accomplish out is about common during the no-contact menses and is usually just used if your ex-cheated on you lot, vanished without breaking upwards with you or did something actually awful like calling off a wedding.

When you first receive this text, yous may think to yourself why does my ex keep texting me, he broke up with me but keeps texting me like everything is normal.  But you know things are far from normal.  But you can't help wonder what it might mean.

Guilty texts are generally not sent nether normal human relationship situations, but if there are breakup circumstances involved, and so just know such texts are ofttimes sent past your ex equally a way to clear his conscience. To make him feel less guilty.  It's a mode for him to relieve those feelings that he did something incorrect and hurt you and perhaps ruined his chances of getting you back.

So to go rid of his guilt, your ex boyfriend will experience compelled to right his incorrect by reaching out to y'all with texts.

The sort of things your ex might say if he is feeling guilty are:-

  • I am deplorable
  • You deserve improve
  • I wish I had never…..

Or if you are a visual learner,

Reason #two: Loneliness May Exist The Pulling Your Ex Down So They Look To You To Pull Them Up

This over again is almost common during the no contact period, especially around the three or 4 week mark. How exercise I know this?

And so, on top of having a ton of information to play with I also do one on one coaching with men and women every unmarried week. One matter I've noticed is that a lot of texts from exes seem to happen effectually weeks 3 to 4 during the no contact rule.

This is considering your ex is used to speaking to you every day, suddenly when you lot are not talking all the time he is going to experience very lonely.

Your ex is going to miss the trivial texts yous used to send to say "Good morning" or "How is your day?" peculiarly if you lot dated for an extended period of time.

This type of text is unlikely if your ex is seeing someone new already as unfortunately your ex is probably going to text her when he is feeling lonely….

The practiced news is that if he is in a rebound relationship so he probably misses you a lot and the new girl is a distraction from the sadness he is feeling.

Sometimes these texts that your ex is sending you comes from a blended mess of feelings which involve both loneliness and guilt. As y'all can see, these post breakup periods can get complicated with all the emotions swirling causing your ex boyfriend to behave oddly and unpredictably.

Its a classic hot and cold kind of behavior that yous might see from him every bit he tries to construct what he wants, only meanwhile he uses y'all to fill up in his lonely gaps.

For more on hot and common cold behavior watch the video below,

So if you want to know why your ex keeps texting you after he broke up with y'all, only know that more than oft than not, information technology is a combination of factors.

The sort of things your ex might say if he is feeling alone are:-

  • Heyyyyyyy….
  • Whats up?
  • Did I see yous at…..

Reason #3: Your Ex Is Bored

This kind of text tends to happen afterward no contact. I bet you lot want to know why, correct?

Well a lot of guys become into political party way directly after a breakup. Being single is heady and he has this amazing vision of all the fun stuff he is going to do with his freedom. One time he has been out a few times, spent all his money and realized all his friends are in relationships, he is going to revert to the life he had before he met you.

Which includes (and is non limited to)

  • Television
  • Computer games
  • Countless tinder rejection
  • Eating takeout
  • Work.

And and so later on he goes through this stage, your ex beau is going to sit upwards and notice, you are non there anymore. He volition notice that it is not quite as fun without you. Now that thought of you beingness missing from his life has ever been style in the back of his mind, cached in your ex's subconscious.

But now since some time has gone by and all these familiar routines that employ to involve you are conspicuously not involving you anymore. This is when these thoughts come to the front of his heed and he begins to realize he is bored, feeling a bit empty with yous, his quondam girlfriend, not at that place.

This is the trigger of your ex boyfriend sending you a " I am bored text"".  Boredom has a style of chipping away at his resentment and anger or any is there that was preventing him to achieve out to yous.

When this happens, he is going to remember how much more fun life was when you were around and he will send you a colorlessness text.

At present similar everyone else, you may exist heartened to go this text from your ex.  Y'all will likely call back my ex simply texted me, should I text him back?  The short answer is non at first.  First you lot will want to verify that your ex bf is truly bored.  Watch for the tone of his next few texts?  Does he seem equally bored?

Then ask yourself that if that is all y'all mean to him…a person who keeps him less bored…exercise yous really desire to respond.  Probably not.

What If It's a Text Triggered by a Rebound Relationship?

OK, so let's change the scenario to something I come across a lot with my coaching clients.

If your ex is dating someone new and you get this kind of text, it is unremarkably a sign that his new girlfriend is already getting on his nerves and the relationship will not concluding.  Your ex fellow really might be getting bored of his new girlfriend, realizing how much more value and contentment you bring to his life.

I'm going to tell you lot that if I was seeing someone new, I definitely would non text an ex-girlfriend to conversation….. that is a large dating no-no!  But but know that some guy will do this, about impulsively, so try to have in the entire picture of whether his texts rise to the level of deserving a reply.

Signs he is texting you out of boredom include:-

  • He puts no effort into texting
  • He has nothing interesting to say
  • Doesn't keep regular contact
  • He just texts when he has zip to do
  • He texts but does non desire to run into upwardly

Reason #4: Your Ex May Be Fighting Off His Acrimony And Resentment

This kind of text is generally probable to happen during no contact or immediately after you lot ship your first text.

If he texts during no contact he is probably angry you are ignoring him and having a tantrum…. I know it's so kittenish right?

If your ex texts you later the no contact period he might exist responding this way to your first text every bit he is angry after the breakup, this is a sign that it is besides soon after the breakup to text him as his feelings are still very raw.

It is also possible it is non so much anger that is bubbles up inside him, merely a long simmering wave of resentment that your ex young man has inside him for y'all.

And then when you ex boyfriend is holding on to lots of resentment for you, he has to find a release and sometimes information technology come out in these passive aggressive texts he volition exit you.

It's not like your ex is in a rage, nor is it an innocent like ex texted how are yous.  But rather he is property on to something that happened and has non worked through it yet.  Then your ex fellow will find some manner to convey some hostility, without being rude.

Is Your Ex Boyfriend Confusing You With His Texts?

Quite often you will find that if your ex-beau sends yous an angry text he will send you lot a kinder apology text hours or days later, this may fifty-fifty become a cycle until his feelings kickoff to settle downwardly.

Are yous feeling dislocated yet?  Is he doing this on purpose?  Does he fifty-fifty know what he wants or is your ex boyfriend playing mind games to confuse you or throw you off the trail of what he really wants.

Your ex is most likely to text y'all out of anger if you cheated on him or if you were the one who initiated the breakup as he feels he lost the control in the relationship which from a guys perspective is pretty humiliating.

There is some good news hidden in here, if your ex texts you when he is annoyed or angry it means he still has feelings for you on some level.

Why?……

Because hate is not the reverse of dearest; indifference is!

If your ex looks like he hates yous, what it actually shows is that they beloved you but feel upset and disappointed that yous didn't meet their high expectations for the relationship and now he is trying to punish yous for information technology.

If you get an angry text it is a very easy one to identify.

  • Signs yous will want to look for are:-
  • He volition blame you for the breakup
  • He seems upset
  • He says he never wants to speak to you lot again
  • He says he hates you
  • He insults you

Reason #5: Your Ex Is Texting Yous For Sexual practice

I'g certain you all know and detest this blazon of text…. It's the booty call text

(Side Notation: If y'all desire to know my thoughts on this kind of text and exactly how you should handle getting it so I can't recommend PRO plenty for y'all. I accept a whole section in in that location covering this verbal scenario.)

Your ex is going to send you this kind of text when he wants to claw-upwardly with you for sex activity.

I hear of these all the fourth dimension.  The girlfriend will be crushed because he ended it or perhaps they both agree to give each other some space.  Sorta like a trial boyfriend and girlfriend separation. Then he will text her and she will be left wondering, "my ex just texted me should I text him back because he seems lonely, distraught, sad, in pain, or whatever information technology is that he wants you to think".

But sometimes, when you peel back the your ex'southward real intentions, he is playing the sympathy card in society to have sex.  Call back, breaking upwards is painful deed emotionally and physically.  We are connected to our lovers in such a way that we are fond in some ways and when nosotros can't have that dopamine release or whatsoever chemical cocktail is produced when we make beloved (think oxytocin), nosotros are capable of doing annihilation to satisfy that urge.

Your fellow may be hungry for your body and you too might need that gear up.  So your ex boyfriend might text something that volition create this sexual stirring and before you know it, you lot and he are having post breakdown sex.

Don't Become a Prisoner To Your Ex Fellow'southward Sexual Urges

Be very careful hither, if your ex-boyfriend wants to have sex it does not mean he wants to go back together and having sex with him is not going to make him autumn dorsum in love with you lot. I've talked well-nigh this many times before but having sex activity with your ex-beau before you are fully back in the relationship is going to damage your chances of getting back together.

When you have sex with your ex exterior of a relationship you lot volition give show him that he doesn't have to put in any try with you, information technology will also make him believe you are the blazon of girl who sleeps with men casually. This is not an attractive quality to a guy….. Guys like getting coincidental sexual practice but they don't keeping girls who like coincidental sexual practice!

If your ex-boyfriend sends you a booty telephone call text it means that he all the same finds you physically bonny which is not bad news, but what y'all really want is emotional allure if you are going to become his girlfriend again…

So remember the un-gettable girl doesn't accept booty calls.

Signs that y'all ex-swain wants to talk to you lot for sex are:-

  • He but texts late at dark
  • He texts when he is drunk
  • He is overly flirtatious or the text is sexual in nature
  • He wants to swap naked pictures
  • He asks you to come over to his place

Reason #half dozen: They Miss You As A Friend

This type of text tin happen either during or after the no-contact period.

Just considering y'all have cleaved upwards doesn't necessarily mean your ex hates you right now, sometimes you ex really misses your company as you had a peachy friendship too.

I know what you are thinking, that this is great news and you lot should dive into being friends. I desire you to be careful if you lot get this kind of text every bit you do not want to end up in the friend zone! The more than friendly you lot are, the deeper into the friend zone yous are going to get….

On the positive side though, from what I have found in one on one coaching calls with clients is that it is kind of rare though that a guy would put his ex-girlfriend permanently in the friend zone, I would simply do that to a woman if I never plant her attractive or viewed her like a sister.

If you had a concrete human relationship and so I would say it's unlikely that he no longer finds you physically attractive.

The main reason you are in the friendzone is that there is a lack of personality chemical science betwixt you lot or that y'all are too available to him and there is no chase or challenge for your ex-boyfriend involved in winning you back.

Signs he misses you only equally a friend include:-

  • Your conversations are very factual
  • He asks your advice on other women
  • He texts y'all to complain well-nigh his bug
  • He talks to you lot like one of the guys
  • He says you are friends
  • He tells you remind him of his sister/cousin/mother

Reason #7: He Wants To Come across If You Accept Given Up and Moved On

This type of message tin happen at whatsoever fourth dimension but is nigh probable during no contact menstruum as your ex-swain volition want to know if he is winning the breakdown!

Basically he wants to run into if he is moving on faster than you.  He can't stand not knowing so your ex boyfriend will ship y'all a text or serial of text letters to effigy out whether you have given up on him.

At present part of this behavior could be due to your excellent work in your social media tactics to portray yourself as the Ungettable Girl and how you are turning effectually your life and living such a happy being.

So your ex bf sees all this and gets this little burdensome feeling each fourth dimension he sees you smile and having fun, getting along quite well without him.  So in society to verify this, your ex will invariably put out some text bulletin feelers to check on your existent emotional status.  In his mind, how could you be so happy, notwithstanding he feels so bad.

The just way for him to reconcile this disbelief in his mind is to text you, hoping to get a clue somehow about whether you still have any lingering feelings for him.

Know That Your Ex Boyfriend Might Be Trying To Nail You Downwards

You might too find yous become this kind of text when you start dating over again every bit he suddenly feels a sense of panic; you may also come across this kind of text shortly afterwards your ex starts dating again so that he tin brag about how great his life is.

If he sends you lot this kind of text message, he is trying to boost his ego by seeing if y'all still care. A guy would really simply send this kind of text if he still valued your opinion so it's a reasonable indication that he still has feelings for y'all.

The motive for his text hither is difficult to understand from one message, it could exist that your ex would like to keep you as a fall dorsum plan incase his current options don't work out, information technology could be that he really misses you lot, or finally it could that he has feelings for you and wants to see if you might still feel the same.

Signs that he is trying to see if you lot accept moved on are:-

  • He asks if you are seeing someone
  • He might endeavour to make you jealous
  • He mentions/checks your dating contour
  • He starts a conversation but vanishes soon later on
  • He seems nervous

Reason #8: Information technology Could be About Relationship Things You Both Have In Mutual

If y'all and your ex lived together, accept joint bills or you owe each other money and then your ex-boyfriend might text y'all to make some arrangements.

This is as well the kind of text you might receive if you have children together as your ex may desire to accommodate kid support payments or visitation rights etc.

If your ex send y'all this type of text, it is not great news…. It means that he currently sees the breakup situation as permanent.

If I wanted my ex-girlfriend dorsum, I would try to postpone collecting my stuff or separating bills for as long as possible because I would exist hoping that things will become back to how they used to exist. Basically I would try and pretend to myself that the breakup wasn't even happening!

This doesn't mean that yous can't yet become your ex back, it just means information technology is going to accept a lot more than attempt and patience compared to some of the other situations.

Signs that you accept received an administration text are:-

  • He but talks most bills/coin/the house
  • He simply wants to hash out the children
  • He doesn't want to meet upwards to talk face to face up

Reason #9: Your Ex Boyfriend Might Actually Actually Want Y'all Dorsum

I know this is the text you have all been excited to read well-nigh.

Actually this kind of text is sent by ex-boyfriends all the time I come across information technology a lot in coaching sessions. It is very mutual for a guy to come to his senses when he realizes what he is missing afterwards a breakup.

An ex-boyfriend tin ship this kind of text at any indicate during or after no contact.

Sometimes an ex will come to y'all during no contact and asks y'all directly to get back together, this tends to happen if y'all broke upward considering you had a big argument. Generally I find that an ex-young man will be more cautious about wanting to get back together and will showtime by making small talk and then say they need to talk to you.

If your ex does want you lot back you volition detect that the frequency of texts he keeps sending will exist high and he volition spend a lot of fourth dimension checking up on you via your friends, family and social media too.

Signs that your ex is sending you a text to get back together:-

  • Asks about your twenty-four hours
  • Mentions talking to your friends or family unit
  • Talks about your Facebook or Instagram
  • He asks to see y'all to talk
  • Says he has a question to ask you
  • He brings upwards inside jokes
  • He calls you by your pet name
  • He gives you compliments
  • He asks to get dorsum together

8 Oftentimes Asked Questions Nearly Why Your Ex Fellow Leaves You Text Messages

Sometimes your ex is so wound upwardly he will exit you lot all sorts of text messages causing you to be both bewildered and baffled, not knowing what to make of it or what to practise.  I get lots of questions from women on this topic of receiving texts from their ex boyfriends.  So permit me help you a flake with processing what might be your ex swain's motivation for sending it and what you should exercise.

FAQ one: How long should I wait to talk to my ex after receiving a text from him later the breakdown?

In that location is really no i stock answer because it depends on many variables such equally how long the two of you lot were together and how adept was the past history between the 2 of y'all to proper name a few.  Only more often than not if the breakdown was harsh and bad feelings remain, then I would suggest waiting at to the lowest degree 30 days before reaching out or responding to whatsoever of his text letters.

FAQ two: When an ex texts you lot, what does it mean when he says he made a error?  Should I trust him?

Once again, yous need to exist careful nigh rushing back into a relationship, specially soon after a breakup has occurred. Emotions are flying high and impulsive determination making can commonly lead to more problems and a ratcheting up of more than anarchy.  So it'south a good sign that your ex thinks he has made a mistake, but one should go information technology boring and not rush right dorsum into the relationship. Take baby steps.  Trust should be earned by your ex boyfriend, non freely awarded to him.

FAQ 3: My Ex Fellow Texted How Are Yous.  What does it mean?  How should I respond?

Don't exist so quick to assign significant from any texts you receive from an ex, particularity if it arrives out of the blue.  You could be doing a disservice to yourself. Information technology could mean annihilation.  He might just exist checking up on you lot equally a friend.  He may be warming up to the idea of reopening the communications aqueduct.  He may be really wanting y'all back, but is afraid to say it outright.  Or your ex swain might have an evil streak in him and is just jerking your chain. It is improve to stick to your program and proceed doing those things yous should be doing as outlined in your No Contact Programme of a Action.

FAQ 4: Why does an ex text me after I told him to go out me lone?

Often it'south because he tin can't let go.  Like you, he should be going through his No Contact programme and focusing on self healing and becoming a better boyfriend for y'all.  But oftentimes, your ex is but a prisoner to his emotions and can't help himself.  The urge to connect with you is so strong he volition often ignore his meliorate judgement and send you text after text, hoping and preying you might respond.  There are other reasons likewise, but that is often the main driver of his behavior.

FAQ v: He broke upward with me but keeps texting me.  Has he changed his mind?

It is possible your ex young man is having 2d thoughts, merely before you can conclude such a thing, y'all really need to see a bigger picture which should include phone conversations and run into-ups to confirm what he is thinking now and why he has had a change of centre.  The last affair you want to do is have a rebound with your ain ex boyfriend.  Jumping right dorsum into a toxic relationship, ane in which neither of yous have solved the cadre problems, is merely asking for more trouble.

FAQ 6: When an ex texts you, what does it mean when he says he needs some space.  Does he still love me?

Information technology'south probable that your human simply needs some down time.  Then don't rush him.  The worst affair you tin can do is get into his space because guys tin can get defensive and insecure if their girlfriend is pushing too difficult.  Your ex boyfriend values his liberty and he might have a lot going on in his mind that he can't notwithstanding work out.  So honour his asking and encounter where information technology leads to before deciding your adjacent move.

FAQ 7: My ex texted me and said I needed to text him back

Remember, you are no one'southward boob. In fact, in many cases, if you text him back like he insists you should, and so you are playing right into his hands.  He wants control, maybe far more than he deserves.  So don't give him control.  This is certainly the case if you are in No Contact.  Certain, if this is an emergency situation, then you certainly would want to communicate.  Inquire him if this is an emergency.   Run into what he has to say.

FAQ 8: What are the reasons why your ex texts y'all all the time?  He has a new girlfriend and I don't know what he wants and am not sure if I should go on responding?

Often a onetime lover will achieve out to you ofttimes just to keep tabs on you.  Mayhap y'all have moved on, but he has non fully accepted that however. Or maybe he is trying to judge your interest level in example this new girlfriend of his doesn't piece of work out.  And so frequently, its a style to go along the communication channel open and satisfy his curiosity about your availability.  He too might still love you and is now having serious 2d thoughts.  So lots of reasons can drive your ex boyfriend's behavior.  So what do y'all exercise if your ex keeps texting you week in and week out? If information technology creates feet or upset feelings, then inquire your ex nicely if he would stop texting yous.

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Source: https://www.exboyfriendrecovery.com/9-reasons-for-why-an-ex-will-text-you-after-a-breakup/

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